A Call to Lead with Influence

Every title and position has its limitations; for our investments into relationships to have a lasting impact, the influence we earn will always trump any authority we hold. That influence, especially when balanced with a healthy dose of humble confidence, can produce a ripple effect that reaches farther than we’ll ever see.

In every aspect of Leveraging Leadership Growth that we’ve worked through to this point, I’ve emphasized the value so many amazing mentors have provided for me - the strength I’ve gained through those great professional relationships. At the risk of minimizing the crucial difference many of them have made in my life, I’ll reference Terry once more before making a specific call to action.

While there have indeed been many mentors who played key roles in my leadership growth, some during times I might not have been able to navigate successfully otherwise, the timing, longevity, and consistency that Terry had provided stands out. After speaking at an event near his home a while back, Cindy and I had the opportunity to catch up with Terry over dinner. At that point, he had been a part of my life for around twenty-five years. (If you’re not completely convinced of the power God’s hand can have in our lives, reach out to me directly and ask about the timing of meeting Terry and Cindy…) Before we were even waited on, Terry handed me a yellow sticky-note that had ten specific dates with brief details for each. As we talked, he shared exactly what he remembered about them all, and we proceeded to discuss at least as many more. Nearly two hours later, we headed our separate directions but I would have been fine if it had gone all evening. That said, our dog-sitter’s time was up and we still have a two hour drive to get home.

I can make direct ties to the influence Terry (and many others) has earned with me to everything I’ve shared to this point. Make no mistake, though, influence transcends boundaries that authority never will. In 2016, as part of the second large public event we ever hosted, Terry served as part of an executive panel. I can’t remember his topic, but I can vividly picture him - a West Point graduate, Army Veteran, and Bronze Star recipient - in tears as he told the audience about a simple thank you card I had sent him a few months prior. Prior to that, I had often asked Terry how I could ever repay him for all he was investing into helping me grow. His response was always, “Pay it forward.” Seeing his emotion in front of that group was the first time I realized that I was on the right track to fulfilling his request - and I’ve been diligent about continuing that process ever since.

Nearly ten years later, Terry joined us for another event as a spectator. During the lunch break, he was intentional about talking with my mom and my son. He hadn’t met my mom before that and it had been close to twenty years since he had seen my son. He was extremely complimentary to both, but had to excuse himself to regain his composure before having the conversation with my son. For close to twenty-seven years, Terry had provided me with an amazing example of what servant leadership looked like; he had been my gold standard for what it looked like to lead with influence rather than through the authority of a title. Seeing the reach we had through that event, which was significantly greater than the one he had been part of years prior, and the man our son had grown into was just a small glimpse of the strength he’s helped me gain through our professional (and now personal) relationship.

Leadership thrives on influence, not authority, unlocking potential for anyone who’s willing to grab hold of it. My challenge for you is to commit to one influence-building action daily, aligning with each of the points we’ve worked through so far, and keep me posted on how that leverages your leadership growth. To do this at the best of our ability, though, we’ll need to come to terms with our own worth - so we’ll pick up there soon!