Negotiating From Principle Instead of Desperation

About a year after declining the global behavior-based safety position, the guy who accepted it visited our facility. I still don’t know if he had any idea that I was offered the role first but I distinctly remember him providing “constructive criticism” around several things we had been doing successfully for years. In The Values Advantage, I detailed what Jeff Henderson’s book, Know What You’re FOR, taught me about differentiating between “constructive criticism” and something he referred to as “alliance feedback.” Having a firm alliance in place was a requirement for bridging that gap, and there was none in this case. Looking back, I can’t say for sure if his input was just that harsh, if I was still carrying some bitterness about the lowball offer a year prior, or I was that intent on sticking up for the team who had backed me in the process for years. It was likely a combination of all three. English was this fellow’s second language so I’m guessing some level of what those of us who were native to Virginia’s Shenandoah Valley would consider courtesy got lost in translation, I definitely still had a bit of sore ass about the offer, and I’ve always been willing to speak up for others I thought were receiving undue criticism - often far too willing. The seed was certainly building toward what I’d soon need for standing on a keen sense of justice; we’ll dig into that specifically shortly.

As I realized just how frustrated I had gotten over someone who may have actually had good intentions sharing his insight, regardless of how little I agreed with him or that I hadn’t asked for it, I knew I needed a change. I had led the local behavior-based safety initiative for more than a decade, and I was one of the most tenured within the company. That said, turning down the global position did indeed mean that I no longer had upward mobility, at least not in that vertical. The fourth leadership attribute Hill described was “Definiteness of Decision,” and I was about to apply it in my career.

Soon after butting heads with the second best behavior-based safety person in the company, I learned that my current human resources manager was planning to add a human resource generalist role locally - a role that had been in place various times over the years but had been vacant for a while. I had no formal training in HR at the time but had been involved in various aspects for years since safety was in that department. And who am I kidding, I’ve never let a detail like not having formal training keep me from getting involved in anything…

Before the position was even posted, I had a very candid conversation with the manager and convinced her that I should be considered. While the sting of being undervalued was still relatively fresh in my mind, I was negotiating from principle instead of desperation. The structure of my compensation would change but the overall salary did not. One condition I had to agree to for her to take the idea to her boss at the corporate level (who was then Rod, my former HR manager) was that I would enroll in and complete a degree in Human Resource Management, paying for classes out of my pocket then being reimbursed as I completed each successfully - and outside my regular work hours. If you remember what I shared previously about why I chose not to go to college after high school and why I stopped enrolling in the night classes I was taking years prior, you may be stunned to learn that I never even hesitated in agreeing to that condition. This time, the conversation had nothing to do with money. The principle driving me in the negotiation process was opportunity and challenge. I knew I was very capable of earning the degree, I just never had a strong enough reason for it before; in the world of human resource law, staying out of jail became that reason.

In all seriousness, growth was the primary driver. Knowing how much developing others through the behavior-based safety initiative fed what had become a clear purpose in my life, this move into a role focused directly on our human resources seemed like a perfect fit. When we build our plans on definite decisions, and tie them to a keen sense of justice, any negotiation can be firmly based on integrity instead of emotion or panic. Moving forward, we’ll look at how that sense of justice and responsibility grew even stronger - in my HR role and in our side hustle. Right now though, I’ll challenge you to think about a recent or past negotiation you’ve had to navigate. Identify one place where your decisions may have been driven more by fear than principle and one small shift you will be able to make next time because of this awareness.