Quick Decision-Making with Influence

The art of responsiveness isn’t based on how quickly we can reply. There are plenty of people I respect deeply who don’t provide an immediate answer when I reach out. However, those folks have intentionally invested into our relationship - just like I have - in a way that’s built grace. When our schedules align, we pick up where we left off by working through any open discussion items prior to jumping into anything new. Since listening to one another over time has built such a solid foundation, we’re each able to respond based on the other’s most pressing need.

But even in times where a complete response may come days or weeks later, there’s always a prompt acknowledgement of each item and purposefulness in how it’s added to an open action register of sorts. This builds mutual respect in the relationship, and we’ll look more at investing in responsive relationships soon, where weakly ducking an issue at all cost erodes that foundation until nothing of substance remains. This simple acknowledgement, even when there’s no time for a complete response, increases influence - both ways.

When we’ve invested, time and time again, into the listening required to establish the proper foundation, we’ve developed a reputation for being responsive with each team member counting on us for leadership, and we’ve effectively adapted to our teams’ needs - be that individually or for the group as a whole - we hone the skills necessary to practice the art of responsiveness. With the influence we earn through that process, we’ll often have opportunities for quick decision making.

I recently bumped into a friend and business associate who’s had a crazy schedule over the last several months, even more so than the normal packed schedule he juggles as a business owner. We actually saw one another at two different events that same day. During the second, he and I had 10-15 minutes off to the side to catch up on a couple of outstanding items I had sent messages to him about. While none of those were earth-shattering, they represented thousands of dollars of work for each of us and each played a crucial role in how our businesses serve one another. Because such a strong foundation has been in place for years, the influence we had each earned with the other enabled swift, effective decisions to be made. And while there was no pressure in that particular situation, it would have made little difference.

In contrast, that same day I bumped into one of the executives I mentioned before who placed the explicit expectation on my friend and his team to respond to any incoming message within 48 hours. I hadn’t seen him in nearly twelve months, with my last outreach to him being just days shy of eleven months prior - one that had also not been acknowledged. When seeing me, his greeting was nearly as warm as the friend with legitimate reasons for delayed responses. I’ll let you guess how I received his disingenuous attempt at schmoozing me in a group setting…

If there’s mutual investment into responsive relationships, influence builds so that tough decisions can be made quickly when necessary. When responsiveness is one-sided, any influence that may have been in place at one time can be (and likely will be) lost. Before we look at how we can purposefully invest in responsive relationships, I’ll challenge you to make a list of the relationships you currently have where you’ve earned the kind of influence necessary for quick decision-making.

Investing in Responsive Relationships

Practicing the art of responsiveness can earn the kind of influence that enables swift, effective decisions - even under pressure. But the higher the stakes, the more important it will be to have made ongoing investments into each of those relationships. Like any sound investment strategy, the time and energy we put into responsive relationships drives measurable returns.

As you can imagine, I have little margin for error through the week. Weekends, however, have become critical catch-up days. That said, one recent Saturday was dedicated as an investment into relationships with several business associates - and overall great friends. Rather than having ten focused hours at my desk to work through things without the distractions that come during the week, I squeezed in two hours before hitting the road. The one hundred mile round trip that followed included three stops at events, about an hour and a half at each, showing support for the teams involved. As important as it is for me to actively build relationships with everyone on each of those teams, that time served as a significant investment in the relationships I have with the leader of each.

Make no mistake, much of the drive time I had throughout the day was spent by me thinking about all that would be waiting on me when I returned to my desk. Nurturing the connection I had with each of those leaders, though, was the absolute best investment I could have made at that time for increasing the responsiveness (and effectiveness) in our relationships. All three of those leaders maintain schedules that are just as busy as mine. In each case, we had time side by side with few distractions. That time not only allowed us to discuss any open items that needed attention, it also helped deepen our already strong friendships.

I can’t think of a single instance over the last thirty years where I’ve asked Terry Ward for some time to solicit his input that he didn’t respond. While that time wasn’t always immediate, his response was. His responsive investment into our relationship, especially since he had nothing to gain, set a tremendous example for how I could work to nurture connections. Chris Rollins, for more than a decade now, has done the same. Before we look specifically at how impactful they’ve been by mentoring through this kind of responsiveness, I’ll challenge you to consider your closest business associates and list the ones where you can begin (or continue) investing in responsive relationships.

Mentoring Through Responsiveness

Earlier, we looked at the importance of mentoring through influence rather than attempting to mentor through control. We may be able to use control for a while, at least as long as the chain-of-command reporting relationship exists, and pretend we’re providing mentorship. But that ship will sail sooner than later if we haven’t invested the necessary energy to earn genuine influence. And if we’re not responsive, there’s little chance we’ll earn much.

Think back to what I shared from Dan Pink as we started this look at the art of responsiveness: “Email response time is the single best predictor of whether employees are satisfied with their boss.” If we can’t get our boss to reply to a simple email, how likely is it that we’ll feel valued enough to ever believe any guidance they offer would serve our best interests over their own? With that feeling in place, would ever truly see them as a mentor? Without investing in responsive relationships, mentorship rarely develops.

Think about the interactions you’ve had with people in positions of power or prestige. Which ones have been consistently responsive, regardless of what’s on their plate or when you contacted them? Which rarely respond at all? And of those, picture the faces of the ones whose names only pop up in your inbox when they need something from you? I occasionally say, “I won’t speak for you,” but I won’t be doing that here! In this case, I’ll speak for us both: if that person who can’t be bothered to reply and only reaches out to us when they have a direct (and usually self-serving) need offers us any input at all, that comes across as criticism - and likely not the constructive kind. Now consider those who reply right away, every single time, even if that’s just to acknowledge our outreach until they have time to respond in full. Even the toughest suggestion is received as alliance feedback when we know we’re valued.

Be honest, which of these would you accept mentorship from? Which would you pursue? For me, they’re one in the same. While a title carries authority, at least in some scenarios, responsiveness earns influence - and effective mentorship is built on that influence. I’ll refer to Terry and Chris once more, primarily because I’ve never reported to either. The responsiveness I’ve experienced from both, Terry for close to 30 years and Chris for more than 10, has shown me unequivocable value. When they offer guidance of any kind, it’s from a place of authentic mentorship. Those faces I pictured who only think of me when they have a specific need… Well, you fill in the blanks…

Now, let’s flip the script. Who contacts you, even on occasion, seeking guidance? Whether they report to you or not, how timely are you in responding? If you’re juggling the slightest bit of leadership responsibility, those requests rarely come at just the right time. I recently had a conversation with a business owner friend who juggles more, personally and professionally, than most people I know. As we talked, he detailed the time he invests routinely into mentoring youth considering his field. He said he hopes to be for them what he needed when he was their age.

The more plates we have to keep spinning, the harder it is to provide a timely response. That’s part of being a leader. We’ll look at handling that pressure calmly next. Before that, think about the people counting on you for mentorship. How can you offer each of them timely guidance? Or if you just can’t right then, how can you acknowledge their need and schedule time to provide the response they really need?